Bryan Johnson’s most controversial tips for living longer

Aspiring immortal Bryan Johnson is attempting to defy death through a gruelling exercise, health and biohacking regime. His pursuits in the longevity space have included measuring his nighttime erections in an attempt to lower his “penis age”, injecting himself with his son’s plasma, and taking around 100 supplements a day. His mantra? “Don’t Die”. Johnson claims he is only ageing 8 months every year thanks to his strict regime.

At tech festival South by Southwest in Austin, Johnson took to the stage to lay out his guide to not dying, which he calls “The Blueprint”. His advice and daily health practices ranges from common sense to wacky.

At a time when the rest of us might be having brunch on the weekend, Johnson has finished up eating for the day. He does this in order to have a perfect night’s sleep, apparently. Eating 8 hours before bed allows his heart rate to drop down to 44bpm, optimising his sleep quality. For us mere mortals, Johnson advises eating your final meal two hours before bed and then dropping down in increments of 30 minutes. “You may experience slight hunger, but that’s ok, your body will get accustomed to it,” he says.

“You’re 70% more likely to die prematurely if you’re not having nighttime boners,” according to Johnson. He has hit headlines for measuring his erections with a device he wears on his penis which looks like an Airpods case with a turquoise strap. On a good night, he’ll have an erection for around three hours in total, similar to a college freshman. He says it’s something women need to think about, too: “the clitoris engorges at night, and in the morning there’s a morning bean,” the equivalent of morning glory. Johnson may be seen as a fun sponge, but he is pro-sex: “Sex has great longevity benefits, so do it,” he says.

If Johnson could have his way, parties would begin at 6pm (latest) and finish up at 8. There would be no alcohol, naturally. Johnson does not believe in letting off steam. “You may perceive it to be fun but it’s really wrecking you,” he says of partying. Johnson encourages us to “remap what you think is fun”: instead of going to a great party and getting drunk with friends, consider an hour-long stint in a hyperbaric chamber, or something.

We may feel better about ourselves when splashing out that little bit extra on organic fruit and veg, but Johnson says “you can’t buy any brand and be safe”. He and his team tested organic black lentils which came back very high in heavy metals, which can cause organ damage. When they called the supplier to ask what was going on, they were told that the company uses human sludge, which can be high in heavy metals, to fertilise the lentils.